December 31, 2015

and the winners are...

What the freaking what?

Yesterday I overheard someone say it was the last Wednesday of the year, and that sounded so weird and wrong. I could have sworn the first Wednesday of the year was just last week... I mean, three weeks ago max...

2015 has been one hell of a year. 'Scuse my language, but emphasis on the helluva part. We started the year frustrated with jobs in Charleston, I started my Pilates certification, I met Frank Abagnale, Jr., Freddie got a new job and we moved to Texas all within a two-and-a-half-week time span, we went to a butt load of weddings (butt load = four), and we started our bigger and better Tex Mex life.  

I also have flown exactly twenty times since we moved so holy bleeping moly, #whydontihaveamillionandfiveskymilesyet?

I seriously thought about going back month-by-month and giving everyone the rundown recap, but that takes a long time to do, and I've got a dog to snuggle wuggle and episodes of Making a Murderer to watch. 

SO...welcome to my Top Five Blog Posts From 2015, according to my stats page

In February I started my Pilates certification program. Two months after I started the program in Georgia, we found out we were moving to Texas. No big deal or anything. Georgia and Texas are so close, right? Not only was I able to continue the program, but I now teach at an amazing studio in Houston where I was taken in completely with full support and open arms. I wrote about the transition from teaching dance to teaching Pilates. My ballerina tattoo even made an appearance. Dear Pilates, sorry I don't have a Pilates tattoo. 

We announced to the world that we were...not pregnant and moving. Moving to Texas! I cannot accurately explain how crazy the experience of Freddie being miserable at his job, interviewing at MD Anderson, being sure he wasn't going to get it, being sad he was so sure he wouldn't get it because he really wanted it, being shocked when he was offered said job, and moving to Texas two weeks after the offer was given was. It was ::insert more descriptive word than crazy here::

Before I made it out to Texas to meet Ricky, I stopped in Georgia to throw my best friend a bridal shower Treat Yo Self style. Side note: my best friend and I always say that a better word than best needs to be used to describe our friendship because we are better than just best friends. Thanks to we now call each other upper crust friends. Don't be jealous.
Side side note: Don't worry, this is not the look we wore to the shower. Obvi. 

2015 was a sad year for the world, in general. There was a lot of hate, and Charleston fell victim to that hate. Seeing a city that is so special to me, that still feels so much like home to me, rise up from such a terrible crime turned me into quite an emotional Emily. Hashtag Charleston Strong, betches! I'm still so proud of Chucky-town for how it handled the tragedy. Other cities in the world, how have you not learned more from Charleston yet? 

drumroll please...
my most viewed post of 2015...
Real Life Vs. Fake Life! Otherwise known as Pillow Talk Isn't Real. Otherwise otherwise known as Why Alcohol And Future Baby Talk Don't Mix. I, however, still refuse to believe that pillow talk is a myth. Just last night I tried to get Freddie to talk to me in bed. Then I fell asleep. But we went to bed at the same time! One step closer to talking on the pils (is that what the cool kids are calling pillows these days?). Progress, not perfection, people.

Enjoy every last second of 2015!
Happy New Year's Eve!

December 30, 2015

Dr. Gnocchi

People always say, Marriage is hard work. Then those people who always say those things start to list off all the ways marriage is hard. 

He snores a lot.
Money is stressful.
Men smell.
Women are needy. <<<men are just as needy. Can I get an amen?
Fighting is healthy.
Fighting is unhealthy. 
Be patient.

But you know the hardest thing about marriage that no one ever tells you/no one ever told me?Surprising your spouse when it comes to Christmas presents. 

AM I RIGHT?! It's virtually impossible. This year I was sent a link to a one day only sale of all 007 movies on Blu-ray (digital copies included), and a spot saved for Spectre included. Along with the link I was told, If you don't get me this for Christmas I will be getting this for myself. Sale ends tonight.

Oh, okay. Well, shoot. Santa can't work in these conditions! The rest of the day Freddie kept asking me/Santa if I/he had purchased it yet, and I kept having to say, Don't worry about it.

Which, duh! Everyone knows that when presents on are the line, don't worry about it means YES! I PURCHASED THAT GIFT FOR YOU. NOW SHUT UP. 

But yadda yadda yadda, Christmas came and left, Freddie got his entire 007 Blu-ray collection (surprise!), and I even managed to surprise him with an Xbox One so suck it, you hard-working marriage. Somewhere around hour eight of our thirteen-hour road trip back to Texas, Freddie got tired of hearing me asking him questions about life so he decided to come up with a plan.

One night every week we watch a James Bond movie, in order, and cook a dinner that goes along with it somehow. 

With our watching one once a week, it will still take us six months to get through them all. Six months of a guaranteed in-house date night?! Six months of Chef Freddie creations?! I didn't care if he was trying to shut up my road trip talk, I jumped on this deal and agreed to his 007 plan. 

You are now entering Monday Funday 007-day at the Weiss household.
First up was Dr. No
A.K.A. - Dubliner and Ricotta cheese gNocchi. With chorizo. Because chorizo rhymes with no, so work with me here, people. 

When making gnocchi, always triple and/or quadruple the amount of flour. Trust me. Not only will it make the gnocchi work and taste better, it will also make you and your spouse work together better. Hashtag I do not belong in the kitchen. 
It was delicious, and totally worth the stress of the mysterious amount of flour needed. Also! Santa brought Freddie that gnocchi paddle for Christmas and guess what? It definitely helps the sauce stick to the gnocchi better (that is sarcasm. We could tell no difference, but we don't want to hurt Santa's feelings now do we?). 

Look, even Lu-ster wanted some, and he's a picky eater. 
Up next week: From Russia With Love.
Spoiler alert: I will not be drinking a White Russian. Barf. 

December 28, 2015

surviving the post-christmas blues

Well, folks. You did it. Hooray! Go, you. You survived the worst, most terrible, horrible, depressing day of the year: December 26. 

Really, I'm quite proud of everyone's persistence to make it through the day. You go from running off of the highest high of Christmastime to crashing hard into the post-Christmas blues. Sure, you have new toys and gadgets to play with...but, but, but how is Christmas already over?! Why are all the decorations still up just to taunt and remind us that next Christmas is 364 days away?! (362 days now...) And who the h-e-you know what wants to un-decorate? I wonder how much I could pay somebody to take down our tree...

My Most Depressing Day Of The Year was spent driving thirteen hours. You see, road tripping with a dog is much like road tripping with a child. Read: lots of pee needing to be peed. Then you add in road tripping with Freddie who needs to stand up and stretch his legs just about as often as someone needs to take a breath so that counts as three of four more extra kids. If my math is correct then road tripping with a dog AND Freddie is like road tripping with 1/5 of the Duggars. Although the Duggars have a giant RV and many drivers to switch between so maybe they're on to something. 

So. Yes. Our ten and a half hour drive took around thirteen hours. Thirteen hours of trying not to cry that Christmastime is over. Thirteen hours of asking Freddie questions like, What are your goals for the new year?! Thirteen hours of Freddie wanting me to turn on music and/or movies so that I wold stop asking questions like, What are your goals for the new year?! Thirteen hours of f-u-n. Fun = us trying to keep our eyes open which is, in fact, a lot harder than it sounds when you're driving through the swamp shiz of Louisiana. 

But Christmas? December 25? It really was the best day of the year!
The best.
The older I get the more sentimental and sappy I get. Meaning when presents were being opened, instead of ripping into them in record time I stopped for a quick two or three seconds to look around my family. I saw the excitement of my sister trying to decide which gift is her turntable because that's the gift she has to open next. Has to! I see my brother trying to stack his new Blu-rays in alphabetical order because order is necessary in the Christmastime chaos. I see my dad trying to post pictures to Facebook because #instantuploadsarenecessary. I see my mom sitting with her jaw on the floor because she still can't believe she got an Apple watch. I see my grandfather falling asleep because apparently opening gifts is boring once you're over the age of 80. I see Freddiehusband still playing with something from his stocking because when one runs on Weiss time, one is always a little behind. 
In those two or three seconds I almost decide to stop opening gifts all together because this, this richness of being surrounded by family, this is all I really need. I never feel so full and just downright complete until I sit in the middle of a perfectly chaotic, and yet oddly peaceful family time. 

Don't worry, I snapped out of it and did somehow manage to finish opening the rest of the presents. Which were all fabulous and wonderful and I can't wait to be so basic and wear my new lace-up flats. ! !! !!!

...but Imma be wearing them all while trying to never let go of that feeling of complete content that only family fun time can bring. 

Hope your Christmases were just as sap dap happy and merry!

December 18, 2015

christmas cheer--blogger style

I know Christmas is not at all about gifts.
it kind of is.
Don't act like you don't get excited when you buy something secret for someone special. The shocked squeal they let out when they open said secret gift is the best.

It's almost as the best as whenever you notice a freshly wrapped present under the tree and it has your name on the tag. Hashtag for me?!

Okay, we're all in agreement that Christmas is a little, tiny bit all about the gifts? Good. In keeping with the A Little, Tiny Bit About Gifts theme this Christmas, I decided to take part in the Blogger Christmas Cheer Exchange hosted by Olya and Mattie

There's not a whole lot I enjoy more than browsing stores at Christmastime. For example, I went in to World Market to pick up some items for the name I drew (Christina!), and somehow/1.5 hours later/$75 later/stocking stuffers for everyone later I left with a shopping bag almost as full as Santa's bag. 

Every time I would head towards the front to pay I would notice part of the Christmas maze in the middle of the store that was undiscovered. You can't leave World Market with Christmas mazes undiscovered! What if the key to all Christmas happiness (a.k.a. something chocolate related) lies within that one corner of the Christmas maze in which you did not enter?! ?!?! !!! How tragic. So yes. Point is: World Market stole an hour and a half of my day and $75 from my wallet and I'm a-okay with that. 

The Christmas Cheer package for me came when I was out of town for Pilates. Freddie opened it and said, "A package came for you. It's dog toys." Dog toys?! I didn't order dog toys? Did Lupe steal my computer and order himself dog toys? 

It took me about 48 hours to realize that A) It was the package from the gift exchange and B) Freddie is bad at telling me information. Because the package of dog toys ended up being a package with one dog toy, a bag of dog treats, and lots of things that weren't dog related at all. Communication is key in marriage, folks. We're rocking it. 

Jenn from hellorigby! sent me the cutest stuff. Going back to my point from the beginning of the post, gifts!! They are fun to open!! (and give). But open!
Has anyone smelled the magestic-ness that is A Thousand Wishes from Bath and Body Works? Because if not go smell it or find me and smell me. Trust me, that's how good this stuff smells---that it wouldn't be weird if you sniffed me. 
Peppermint dark chocolate and Kettle Pop Gum! (<<wut? I know). 
I also got this Marshmallow Fireside candle that was in Wednesday's post. Update: it's already below halfway burned. Oops and sorry not sorry and all of that. 

I couldn't believe how thoughtful it was of her to include Mr. Lups in the gift receiving. He has thoroughly enjoyed chasing and rolling around his new ball. And by thoroughly I mean he gets really confused when his paw touches it and it rolls away. This causes lots of paw moving the ball and chasing the ball time which then causes lots of nap time from said ball chasing so we're all happy.

A big Christmas Cheer filled thanks to Oyla and Mattie for hosting something so fun, and to Jenn for gifting something(s) so fun! Let's do it all again next year.

And by next year I mean around Valentine's Day because who says gift exchanges can't be quarterly? Wink.

Happy Friday!

December 16, 2015

scenes around the Christmas home

Iiiiiiiiit's that time of year!
Sing it with me...
When the blogs look the same
Every post you see seems to be titled...
Holiday Home Tour.

Pause the song here so you can relish in the fact that I am also giving you a holiday home tour post because why the heck not?! Christmas decorations are fun, and being nosy and seeing other people's Christmas decorations is equally as fun. 

Christmas in Texas is very similar to Christmas in Charleston. 
Example A: It is 70 degrees outside and does not feel like December.
Example B: It rains. A lot. 

The biggest difference, of course, is that we don't have any snow...y white beach sand to look at, but we could always drive down to Gavelston for some of that. Another difference is that a lot of Christmas decorations here seem to embrace the lone star symbol to some extent. Texans love themselves some lone stars, and I love anything that's Christmas related, lone star or not, so we're all happy here. 

Let's start with the most important item of interest: the tree. This year's tree is named Kandi. With a 'K' and an 'I' because that's how festive, sassy, and fun she is. 
Meet Kandi's shining glory, the party tree topper. Straight up disco-style Christmas celebrating in here. 
Does that sign look like Merry Christnas to anyone else? 
And that's about as decorated as you can get with 600 square feet. Just kidding, we have other odds and ends set out, but these are the decorations I see most often from where I plant my bootay on the couch.
How could I forget Santa Ricky underneath the mistletoe?!
Thank God for PicMonkey Santa hat overlays that make pictures more fun.

We're headed to Georgia on Sunday to spend Christmas there. I am so excited I can hardly stand it. Mostly because we can snuggle. And hold hands! And eat cookie dough! And drink wine by the Christmas tree! And snuggle some more! And go look at the two-story Christmas tree and all the local decorations we grew up with!

Did I mention wine by the tree? And cookie dough? Okay, good.

What's your favorite Christmas decor?
Last year's Christmas home scenes here

December 11, 2015

friday favorites: the kinda Christmas related edition

Writing Friday Favorites during the month of December is just...hard. I want only to do Christmas related posts, you don't only want to read Christmas related posts, and blah blah blah here we are

So welcome to a Semi-Christmas Related Friday Favorites. 

Favorite Christmas Song
I lied. This is in no way my favorite Christmas song, but dagnabbit! Why can't I stop singing it all the time?! Kelly! Just stop! 

Favorite Food
My father is way into cast iron skillets. When I say way into, I don't mean it in the way you are thinking. You're thinking, Wow, Emily's dad must be really obsessed with cast iron skillets! No, that's wrong. My dad is a whole, new, way higher level of obsessed with cast iron skillets. I am 100% okay with this obsession because he made cast iron pizza for dinner last night. The most perfect food to eat after a full day of Pilates training. Thank you, tranversus abdomimus, for working hard so I can eat pizza. 

Favorite Pilates Move
messy hair, and so do not care
Climb A Tree.
Take my advice and don't try this at home when you don't have proper Pilates equipment. But when it's 10 pm on Thursday night, and you don't have a picture for your Favorite Pilates Move section on your blog for Friday morning, you improvise by letting your mom hold down your leg and the couch arm be your short box.
Now, let's go climb a Christmas tree!

Favorite Thing You Should For Realsies Know About
One word, five million happy faces: Swagbucks
If you don't know about Swagbucks, then...well that's probably not that weird. It's a website where you can take surveys, watch videos, and so on and so forth all while earning these magical things called Swagbucks. Your Swagbucks transfer into gift cards which transfer into buying lots of Christmas presents! Yay, Swagbucks. Can't wait to gift all the cool swag I've gotten all thanks to your bucks. 

Favorite Christmas Tree
My parent's house, a.k.a. the Brady Bunch look alike home, is a strange house with very tall ceilings. The tall ceilings come in handy during the month of December when the 12-ft. Christmas trees are calling our names. Growing up we always wanted the biggest tree ever, but I think this year's officially wins at the vertical challenge. It is tall and beautiful and majestic and amazing and I'm so happy a Pilates weekend brought me to Georgia just so I could stare at this tree for a few days. 

Happy Two Weeks Until Christmas Friday!
Linking up with Karli and Amanda

December 9, 2015

fake life vs. real life

Today we are going to talk about marriage and Fake Life. You know, the life where your expectations are alive and reign freely. The life that doesn't have to be covered with three Instagram filters + 6x more brightness and 18x more contrast.

We're also going to talk about marriage and Real Life. The life where Come on! You're close to 30! Don't you know by now not to have any expectations?! The life that is covered with three Instagram filters + 6x more brightness and 18x more contrast because LAWD, doesn't that make everything way prettier? Where's the app that can make my face and life look like that permanently?

To make this post easier to write (and much harder to read/comprehend), let's refer to our life choices today as FL and RL. Bc u no, abbrv r + fun. 

Example #1
It's bed time (so it's 9pm. I'm embracing my grandma-ness). As always, you and your hubby wubby love of your life are tired at the same exact time, so off to bed holding hands it is! Even though you're both so tired with hearts so full, you stay up late pillow talking into the wee hours of the morning. Pillow talk is the best! Remember that one night you stayed up talking about all your hopes and dreams for the next five years?! Man, the next five years are going to rock.

It's bed time. Well, for you. You've tried staying up to spend more time with your night owl husband, but he is still going strong, and the clock reads 10:45 which is exactly one hour and forty five minutes after your witching hour. And you know what rhymes with witch...yes, you are correct: twitch. Which is exactly what your eyes are doing because they are so tired. You steal a quick kiss before literally leaping into bed. Your wide-awake biffle reluctantly agrees to go to bed and says he will be there in ten.

Two minutes later you are passed the heck out. What's pillow talk? Does it have anything to do with drool being on your pillow? No?
fake life blog
And if you're lucky maybe your husband will snap a pic of your drooling, sleepy face. 
End scene.

Example #2
Babies. One little word for one big change. But man, when you see those baby pictures of your spouse you know you need/want at least ten of those running around your house. Think of how many mini-chefs you'd have in the kitchen! They'd be the perfect mix of your sense of planning and organization, and your spouse's sense of adventure and spontaneity. Because duh, children get all the good traits from both parents and none of the bad traits. Back to family and husband lay down for your nightly performance of Pillow Talk and have a serious, heart-to-heart conversation about when you both want children. Bonus! You are both on the exact same page! Even down to the month of the year when you think those future children should be born. Not surprising though, giggle giggle, you and your man are always on the same page.

Babies. You want a handful of them, and you want them to be 100% as cute as Baby Freddie, but Dear God, please let them get neither of our hair and/or cow licks. In Jesus' name, Amen. When it comes time to discuss future children you wait until both of you have had AT LEAST two drinks. At least, people. The more the better. You then proceed to leave the dance floor at one of your best friend's wedding and try to convince your future baby daddy to shake on it and be in agreement with what you want.
fake life blog
Ten minutes later and no shaking agreement has occurred. Now your several years plan has expanded to several more years, and you don't even remember what point you were trying to make ten minutes earlier.

^^^My Real Freaking Life. 

There you have it. Welcome to my unfiltered real life of going to bed early and trying to get my husband to shake it out when it comes to family planning. Also, all I want in life is pillow talk. Is that too much to ask?

What's your unfiltered life like? Please don't tell me pillow talk is all fake. 

December 7, 2015

a catch-up

Important item number one.

We've decide that Lupe is Max from How The Grinch Stole Christmas. Notice I didn't say that we've decided that Lupe looks like Max, because he doesn't just look like Max. He straight up is Max so I suppose that means we need to rig up an antler for him for Christmas Day. These are my holiday priorities and they are important.
Sorry for the graininess. Freddie made this collage, and he is so obviously not a blogger. 
Speaking of priorities...

I've been going a tad crazy when it comes to wrapping presents. There have only been so many presents that have already arrived via USPS so I'm kinda at the point where I'm beyond ready to wrap, have no more presents to wrap at the moment, and am about to start wrapping random household items just so I can wrap all. day. long.
Who wants a super cute picture frame with a picture of me and my siblings in it for Christmas?! Or a hair brush? Oh listen now, I can legitimately wrap up about 12 bobbi pins that I've found laying around recently. 

Speaking of which, I feel like I should also be rapping all day long. But that's for another post. 

Item two. Go buy this at your local Trader Joe's right now. I mean, you could probably wait until your lunch break to get it, but it definitely cannot no-way-no-how wait until after you get off work. You need it now. 
Next on the list, guess what? Remember this post when I talked about my friend doing the one second video every day and her end of the year compilation video being the cutest thing ever? Yes? Good. 
Well we're only 24 days away from the end of the year, and ICANTWAITTOWATCHMYVIDEO. Get ready for a handful of missed days, a plethora of nighttime oops-I-almost-forgot-to-take-a-video-so-here's-me-doing-something-in-the-dark-before-I-hit-the-hay video, and then a few real videos that I remembered to take. It's going to be EPIC

One more thing. We went out for drinks on Thursday night, and might I suggest everyone go out for drinks on Thursday nights? It makes the week feel shorter and more doable/achievable. It also makes Thursday feel kind of like Friday, and who could hate that? #ihavefoundthesecrettoagoodweek

p.s.--went to HomeGoods yesterday and didn't buy a single thing. Currently waiting for a pig to fly by our balcony. 

December 4, 2015

friday favorites: the flair f-edition

We're going to spice things up a bit today for our alliteration today. 

Five Freakin' Fantastic and Fun Flair that I think is cool for Christmas and am telling you about on a Friday.
Christmas gift blog
I guess I could add in another F by adding a sidebar of: ...that I think Freddie should get me. Hint hint. Or should I say fint fint for today? Or is adding the letter f in front of every word just going to annoying?

Anyways, in a non-annoying way that will make much more sense, let's just say that this is a list of cool things I think would make good gifts. Why didn't I start with that? 

Favorite Gift for the Music Lovers
Personalized Guitar pick -- Because anything with a pun makes for the best gift. <<study shows that or something. Just believe it. 

Favorite Gift for the fake Chef, a.k.a. my husband.
Meat grinder attachment for KitchenAid Mixer and/or a KitchenAid mixer.
Listen, I know you don't think you would use a meat/food grinder a lot, but trust me on this one. It's awesome. It's also awesome getting it as a gift because that means you have to write a thank you note for said gift, and lemme tell ya...there are no ways to write a thank you note for a meat grinder and not have it sound 100% dirty. Think about it.

Pro-tip: in getting a gift for a chef, make sure it is also something you, the professional taste tester for said chef, will also benefit from. 

Favorite Gift for People Who Can Pull Off Trends
Tassel earrings. But especially these, these, and these. I just don't think I'm at a point in my life where I am confident enough to wear tassels on my ears, but I want you to do it so I can try to get more brave and do it as well. Thanks. 

Favorite Gift for the Pilates guru
Zella Live Free Tee -- Because even when the AC in the studio is blasting and you have cold sweat, you still gots ta look cute. 

Favorite Funny Must-Have Gift for everyone
Pie Kelly -- I can add no commentary to this. It is everything on its own. 

Happy First Friday of December!
Linking up with Karli and Amanda.

December 2, 2015

currently: the christmas not overload edition

Welcome to the last month of the year. 
I'll give you a second to silently curse to yourself in amazement at how fast this year has gone, and then we'll get started with the last 2015 Currently linkup.

wishing // 
Time needs to slow down this month! I 100% like to go cliche Christmastime crazy (just like everyone and their mom...) and it's hard to soak in every Christmas-y second when the month goes by in what feels like a week. December, please spread out into what feels like three months. Four months! Five! Although...that might get old. I'll stick with three months. Thanks.

remembering //
Growing up we got a new ornament every year. My mom did this because she said she wanted us to have our own ornament collections for when we grew up and lived on our own. Well, shucks and a half, I have definitely got a collection going on. From Aladdin and Jasmine to 100 assorted ballerinas to a giant mirrored disco ball, I've got the ornament part of Christmas down. I love unpacking them and trying to remember what in the world was going through my head in the year 1999 when I just had to have that Queen Amidala ornament (I also try to remember what in the world was going through my head in 1999 when my friends and I used to constantly do Queen Amidala makeup on each other).

wrapping //
Does stuffing presents into bags count as wrapping? Because if so then I am rocking this whole wrapping thing. But come on, when Target's dollar section has bags this cute you can't really wrap stuff, right? Right.

baking //
I'm not sure if you've picked up on the fact that I don't cook (because I only mention it every other post or so), but that always includes baking. Baking stresses me out even more than cooking does. So instead of use my 15% off Christmas M&M's coupon and eat all the peanut butter M&M's. I love baking eating M&M's!

decorating //
We got our tree and got it decorated which means the ribbon cutting has happened and the grand opening of Christmastime can begin. The apartment is also decorated and it feels like Christmas straight up vomited in here which means it feels perfect.

Linking up with Anne and Jenna!


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