from the deep, dark archives

**Originally posted on January 11, 2012. A.K.A. many moons ago. 

I am a lot of things. Left-handed, loud (rarely), sarcastic (rarely), and Ann just told me I was high maintenance. So take that with a grain of salt. One thing I am not: daring. Or, to show off my newfound GRE vocabulary, audacious. I don't like putting myself out there or being different or doing new things or meeting new people or blahblah you get the picture. Because of this lack of audacity, I have a wardrobe that consists mostly of gray clothing. As my sister puts it, I wear b-o-r-i-n-g clothes. 

Sorry that I think the color gray is fantastic and goes well with my coloring! What does that say about my coloring? My dad does say my eyes are "mossy stone"... I also am terrified of accessorizing because well earrings are the opposite of boring so I couldn't possibly wear those. So there, now you know just how boring my boring gray boring wardrobe is. 

That all changed today. Today I became fearless! Daring! I walked right up to Mr. Audacious and linked arms with him and walked away with my head held high. Did I mention I was wearing my newly purchased fur vest when I walked away? 

MLE say whaaaat? Yep, you nay-sayers (it's faux fur so let's all take a chill pill) can kiss my fur because I bought one and I am sportin' it harder than Billy Ray Cyrus sported/continues to sport a mullet. Or Michael Jackson sported a single sequined glove. Or Joseph sported his coat of many colors.

Enough with the analogies. Just know that I am wearing it right now with my jammies. Because everyone knows it is tres important to break in fur. 

rawr. Also, high five on the taking pics of myself. That is so 2003 and MySpace-y.

p.s.--New York tomorrow which means Book of Mormon soon which means cold weather soon which means I should probably wear my new meow vest soon. 

Also, as I began writing this post I asked my dad and sister what adjectives they would use to describe me. This is how that went down:

Dad: Funny. Brilliant. Smart. Wonderful daughter.

Ann: High maintenance. Annoying. Oh, (hearing Dad) uh...amazing. 

Ann, too late you can never borrow my not boring awesome furry vest. Dad, you are more than welcome to it anytime. 

christmas cheer--blogger style

I know Christmas is not at all about gifts.

But...

it kind of is.

Don't act like you don't get excited when you buy something secret for someone special. The shocked squeal they let out when they open said secret gift is the best.

It's almost as the best as whenever you notice a freshly wrapped present under the tree and it has your name on the tag. Hashtag for me?!

Okay, we're all in agreement that Christmas is a little, tiny bit all about the gifts? Good. In keeping with the A Little, Tiny Bit About Gifts theme this Christmas, I decided to take part in the Blogger Christmas Cheer Exchange hosted by Olya and Mattie. 

There's not a whole lot I enjoy more than browsing stores at Christmastime. For example, I went in to World Market to pick up some items for the name I drew (Christina!), and somehow/1.5 hours later/$75 later/stocking stuffers for everyone later I left with a shopping bag almost as full as Santa's bag. 

Every time I would head towards the front to pay I would notice part of the Christmas maze in the middle of the store that was undiscovered. You can't leave World Market with Christmas mazes undiscovered! What if the key to all Christmas happiness (a.k.a. something chocolate related) lies within that one corner of the Christmas maze in which you did not enter?! ?!?! !!! How tragic. So yes. Point is: World Market stole an hour and a half of my day and $75 from my wallet and I'm a-okay with that. 

The Christmas Cheer package for me came when I was out of town for Pilates. Freddie opened it and said, "A package came for you. It's dog toys." Dog toys?! I didn't order dog toys? Did Lupe steal my computer and order himself dog toys? 

It took me about 48 hours to realize that A) It was the package from the gift exchange and B) Freddie is bad at telling me information. Because the package of dog toys ended up being a package with one dog toy, a bag of dog treats, and lots of things that weren't dog related at all. Communication is key in marriage, folks. We're rocking it. 

Jenn from hellorigby! sent me the cutest stuff. Going back to my point from the beginning of the post, gifts!! They are fun to open!! (and give). But open!

Has anyone smelled the magestic-ness that is A Thousand Wishes from Bath and Body Works? Because if not go smell it or find me and smell me. Trust me, that's how good this stuff smells---that it wouldn't be weird if you sniffed me. 

Peppermint dark chocolate and Kettle Pop Gum! (<<wut? I know). 

I also got this Marshmallow Fireside candle that was in Wednesday's post. Update: it's already below halfway burned. Oops and sorry not sorry and all of that. 

I couldn't believe how thoughtful it was of her to include Mr. Lups in the gift receiving. He has thoroughly enjoyed chasing and rolling around his new ball. And by thoroughly I mean he gets really confused when his paw touches it and it rolls away. This causes lots of paw moving the ball and chasing the ball time which then causes lots of nap time from said ball chasing so we're all happy.

A big Christmas Cheer filled thanks to Oyla and Mattie for hosting something so fun, and to Jenn for gifting something(s) so fun! Let's do it all again next year.

And by next year I mean around Valentine's Day because who says gift exchanges can't be quarterly? Wink.

Happy Friday!

teach me how to blog

This is a post where YOU get to answer all of my questions! Yay! You see, just as we learned with this face wash ordeal, I am easily persuaded and listen to what other people say way too often (or maybe just often enough...).

Anyways, welcome to Teach Emily A Thing Or Two Wednesday. 

Sorry I didn't make it alliteration. Blogging fail #1 and/or 528. 

Sidebar: I have read so many posts from bloggers that discuss these very topics about which I am going to ask you. Like so many. As in too many. I just want a straight up easy answer telling me exactly what you think about questions 1-5. Is that asking for too much? No? Kthx.

1) How important is a Facebook page for your blog? Like truly, seriously, for realsies. I obviously do not have 500 million followers. I also do not have 500 followers. So give me the scoop, does a little bitty blog like mine need a separate page?

2) Should I buy a domain? If I do, will it completely screw up Bloglovin and other sites I have linked to this blog? Because that sounds complicated and annoying, but mostly scary. 

3) I need a detailed list of post ideas. HA, September Fools. Ignore #3. I've got a great list of posts coming. Fasten yer seatbelts.

4) Affiliate programs. What are the best ones to use? I've read a ton about this and the two that stick out are Amazon Associates and ShareaSale. Am I right? Am I wrong? Should I quit reading?

5) Which kind of posts are your favorite? Obviously you are not getting fashion ideas from me or learning how to rock a half-up top knot from me, so what are you getting from me?

5.5) Should I get faux leather leggings?! And a floppy, fall hat??

I've gone back and forth a lot (read: more than a lot) about how seriously I want to take this blog and what I want to put in/get out of it. Obviously I'm not in this to try to blow up my blog with 500 million followers or anything, but I would like to spruce it up a bit and make it real niiiiiiice. Ultimately I want to give it my best, no matter what. As my good best friend Ron would say:

I'm ready to Whole-Booty this thang.

Thanks ahead for any and all expert advice/answers/words!

i never thought blogging would...

-make me click Publish on posts of me saying and doing crazy things that everyone can see.

When I say make me I do mean it in the I-had-no-choice kind of way. Blogging does that to you. It gives you no choice but to share embarrassing stories. It gives you no choice but to click that Publish button. It gives you no choice but to say HEY INTERNET WORLD, COME LOOK AT THIS CANDID PHOTO OF ME WHERE MY MOUTH IS OPEN AND THERE'S A DROOL STAIN ON MY SHIRT. Let me go ahead and ruin the fun by telling you no, I have never posted a picture of myself like that but yes, I am sure there are many pictures out there of me just like that. 

Like these, for instance. Oh wait, I just shared embarrassing photos of myself. Blogging made me do it. My B. 

-turn me into the kind of blogger that has the awesome yet strange social media based friendships with so many people.

I wrote a whole post here about how we live in a wildly weird blogging world. A Wonderland of Blogging, if you will. I know your name. I could pick your face outta a big 'ole crowd of people. I know you like chocolate chip banana bread, but hate eating regular bananas. I know you went apple picking this past weekend and even ate some of the apples for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day. I know you got your haircut and I even know your every day make-up routine. 

But do I reeeeeally know you? 

Hashtag: Life's deep questions #567

Hashtag: I don't care because I still love you. And I still call you my friends instead of my bloggy friends. And it confuses everyone around me

-take over my mornings. And evenings. And every thing in between.

On an average day I...

Read my blogs. Feel behind if I don't get to all of them during some point of the day. Think about when I should next post. Think about something about which I could write. Go back and forth on recently thought-of topic. Ask Ricky or my mom or a friend if that sounds like a good idea. Mooch off of them for better ideas. Sit down to write. Get distracted reading other blogs. Go back to writing. Decide not to post for tomorrow. And finally...read some more blogs. 

All in a day's work, my friends, all in a freaking day's work. On some of those average days I manage to do some other things, as well. Like life and work and stuff. 

-turn me into a winner.

And no, I don't mean that it turned me into a winner at life (even though it did, obvi), but I mean a winner of giveaways. Winning is f-u-n. My best friend won a bike from Wendy's once and I mean if that's not making it in life then shucks, I don't know what is. But I have won a Home. T and a return address stamp so I'm making it somewhere in life, that's for sure.

-make me a millionaire. 
Spoiler alert: It hasn't. I never thought it would and I don't expect it to. The End.

Linking up with Helene/Taylor and Karli!