October 19, 2015

when fall is non-existent

I haven't been able to make myself make a fall bucket list because a) it's still been 90 degrees in Texas and b)...well, there is no b) because did you read a)? I wore shorts the other day and in my mind I knew that technically it was seasonally inappropriate to wear shorts in October, but it was shorts weather! I couldn't not wear shorts! 

^^firstworldiliveintexasproblems <<itsthegenerationofhashtagsandidontusethespacebaranymore

When I landed in Georgia a few days ago the weather was 78 degrees. 78! It felt like winter! And right now it's 49 degrees in Georgia which feels like winter in Antarctica! Duh. I have been wearing the crap out of my new, necessary houndstooth vest, and I don't even care who knows it. Am I a basic betch yet? Please?

Since I've been feeling very wintery in this oh-so-cold (sarcasm) Georgia weather, I thought it was about time for me to start doing some fall stuff. 

Enter the corn maze
The Muppet themed corn maze!
Muppet corn maze

Let me start by saying corn mazes confuse the bleep out of me. I don't understand why they hand you a map because...well, because how is that helpful? Is the dirt path between the corn really a yellow brick road? No? Then I definitely will not be able to make any sort of sense of it. Will the map turn into a drone and take me over the corn so I can see where the punch stops are? No? Thanks, but no thanks. I'll just be in this maze here for the next six to seven Octobers. Don't mind me between the months of November-September 2015-2021. 

The good news is my mother and father were there and apparently reading fake maps of corn mazes are one of the additional skills they should both add on their resumes.
Oh, we're definitely in Fozzie's smile right now!
This dead end is Kermit's crotch!
We're somewhere inside Miss Piggy.
^^I can't make this stuff up. 

Somewhere between the curve of Kermit's butt and zig zag of Gonzo's eyebrows we managed to find 10 of the 12 number stops AND find the exit. Actually technically we found the exit a lot. In fact, I think we passed the exit more than we passed anything else in that field. Except for stops #2 and #10---those number stops just downright did not exist. I'm convinced. I'm also convinced that if you had seen a bird's eye view of us you would have just seen us walking in circles and pretending like this stalk of corn was a brand new one that we had never seen. Wow! This stalk looks way different than the other thousands of stalks!  I'm also also convinced that corn mazes just tell you that the shape of the maze looks like such and such, but really it's just random paths with no rhyme or reason

I even managed to snap this blurry picture of my dad totally winning at the corn maze by finding a number in Rowlf's ear. 

Other important fall things for you slash me to do:
-Get a hot chocolate from Starbucks just so you can carry around a Starbucks cup. Gross, coffee.
-Take a picture with pumpkins, but definitely don't buy those pumpkins because you should already have some BECAUSE IT'S ALREADY OCTOBER 19, PEOPLE. Bonus points if the pumpkins are around hay.
-Wear a sweater with a chambray shirt under it and a vest over it, and document it. #fall #ootd #yas
-Put glitter on the tops of your previously purchased pumpkins. Just trust me on this one.
Blog corn maze

It's back to the Land of Summer Fall for me tonight sooo...BRB, gotta go soak up every last second of wearing long pants. 

Are you able to play real life Signs and successfully navigate through millions stalks of corn?


Jeff Nelson said...

I thought Freddie and I taught y'all better last year...tsk tsk ;-)

Morgan Apfel said...

Hahahaha in agreeance with the weather and corn mazes. I could never understand those things. And hopefully wherever you are in Texas today is nicer (or wait didn't you say you were in Georgia lol?) today. It was like 59 here this morning Houston-ish) and I was like, HALLELUJAH pants! I hope it stays because I am super excited to pack up my summer stuff. And I did buy a vest....which I'm super pumped about so I need to wear it everyday. Also haven't gone to Starbucks yet this season and proud of it lol.

x Morgan / www.morningappleblog.com

Mattie @ Northwest Native said...

I looove corn mazes! But really...corn maze maps? You have to be some sort of wizard to figure those out. Your parents are magical.

Erin LFF said...

You probably read about our lil adventure in the corn maze last week- we couldn't solve it all either. I'm convinced their map was wrong though, we circled the same area dozens of times and just couldn't figure it out. I LOVE your muppets one though, Jared would have died and went to heaven over that theme haha!

Amanda Elizabeth - Meet @ the Barre said...

Thats totally how it feels sometimes here in Fl with trying to make seasons happen. However it cooled down for like a day and I was all trying to bust out my blanket scarf ;-)

Kristen @ See You In A Porridge said...

bahaha yes! i get hot chocolates from starbucks all the time. hashtag cool. hashtag gross coffee.
that maze looks terrifying. kermit's crotch or not.
i'm jealous of your 90 degree weather. sigh.

Caitlin @ Candyfloss & Persie said...

lol, looks fun!!! I'm in California for my first Fall/Winter and I'm scared I wont' feel the holiday spirit myself with this constant sun! dying for a cornmaze

Trish @ The Trish List said...

I always get lost in corn mazes! I refuse to go in them if its getting close to being dark cause I'd be the one who got lost forever lol

Candace Shiflet said...

I feel you girl!! It was in the 100's last week for us like wtf!! But of course I keep sneaking in winter clothes and hoping for the best. It stays warm. Anddd seriously a map in a corn maze is pointless! I will probably get more lost with a map haha I just see corn and more corn in those whenever I try to find my way around them. Glad you made it out alive ;) haha
xo, Candace | Lovely Little Rants

Joey @ Hodgespodges said...

Aw I'm so glad that you got to experience SOME fall! Hopefully fall will come to TX eventually!

Lita said...

Hahahaha why the muppets? Like why is that legitimately an appropriate maze theme? I am so glad you got out alive because I definitely needed this story as prep for the corn maze I'm going to this Friday. I always get so frustrated when I am inside a maze that is taking forever to get out of. I literally get pissed off at the maze. Obviously I have unresolved issues. It's cool.



Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...