on having favorites on a friday

Insert obligatory paragraph HERE about how I cannot believe it's already October. But really, how is it already October? I feel like I was just eating Halloween candy the other day...

Favorite Jam

This Girl by Punch Brothers

Anyone ever listen to Nickel Creek? Now, don't get too excited. I knew you thought I was going  Nickleback there. The dude, Chris Thile, sings in many bands, apparently, and Punch Brothers is one of them. Enjoy my current car jam where I pretend I am the girl that is this girl that they are singing about, obvi.

Favorite Food

Freddie made broccoli slaw and ohmygosh. Oh my gosh! I have never been so excited to eat nasty green vegetables.

Every morning when I wake up I get excited knowing that I get to eat that dang broccoli slaw for lunch. Mmmm! I'm excited all over again just typing it out now. Is it lunch yet and/or can I eat broccoli slaw for lunch? Can I say broccoli slaw any more times before it gets annoying?
^^ sad update: Freddie finished it all last night. My life has no meaning. Carry on.

Favorite Expensive Thing I Want

This category is going to start being a weekly regular because a) apparently I want a lot of expensive things and b) maybe someone will read this blog, take a/some hint(s), and Christmas will be full of expensive surprises. #wishfulthinkingfriday

But how cute and necessary are these?! Emphasis on the necessary. 

Found here. Hint hint. Wink wink. 

Favorite Pilates Move 

a.k.a.--I just wanted another reason to make a fun gif. 

Side plant to twist. This picture is brought to you by a) post-workout sweating stank bod, Freddiehusband, and our kitchen floor. Cheers, enjoy. May your side plank to twist form look better than mine. 

Favorite It's Obviously 2015 Thing

Do you ever wonder how people shared big life events in the past? Like how did you let everyone know your baby had a blowout in his or her diaper before Facebook? And how did you tell all of your friends you were engaged before texting? Those times must have been hard times. Snail mail should be called snore mail because I would have fallen asleep waiting to hear all of my friends' big news. It feels like all of my friends are getting engaged and married and it is all SO exciting! Rings! Weddings! Parties! One of my friends made this collage using the pictures that we all texted to one another to spread the news that we were engaged and not underage.

Oh, no one cares about this picture other than me? Weird. Well, whatever. I love it!

Happy Friday! 

And Happy October. May your fall be cooler than 89 degrees, but warmer than 8 or 9 degrees. 

pee-ssss: Thank you all so much for your helpful comments and blogging advice from Wednesday's post. You (plural) da best. 

Linking up with Karli and Amanda! As always. 

teach me how to blog

This is a post where YOU get to answer all of my questions! Yay! You see, just as we learned with this face wash ordeal, I am easily persuaded and listen to what other people say way too often (or maybe just often enough...).

Anyways, welcome to Teach Emily A Thing Or Two Wednesday. 

Sorry I didn't make it alliteration. Blogging fail #1 and/or 528. 

Sidebar: I have read so many posts from bloggers that discuss these very topics about which I am going to ask you. Like so many. As in too many. I just want a straight up easy answer telling me exactly what you think about questions 1-5. Is that asking for too much? No? Kthx.

1) How important is a Facebook page for your blog? Like truly, seriously, for realsies. I obviously do not have 500 million followers. I also do not have 500 followers. So give me the scoop, does a little bitty blog like mine need a separate page?

2) Should I buy a domain? If I do, will it completely screw up Bloglovin and other sites I have linked to this blog? Because that sounds complicated and annoying, but mostly scary. 

3) I need a detailed list of post ideas. HA, September Fools. Ignore #3. I've got a great list of posts coming. Fasten yer seatbelts.

4) Affiliate programs. What are the best ones to use? I've read a ton about this and the two that stick out are Amazon Associates and ShareaSale. Am I right? Am I wrong? Should I quit reading?

5) Which kind of posts are your favorite? Obviously you are not getting fashion ideas from me or learning how to rock a half-up top knot from me, so what are you getting from me?

5.5) Should I get faux leather leggings?! And a floppy, fall hat??

I've gone back and forth a lot (read: more than a lot) about how seriously I want to take this blog and what I want to put in/get out of it. Obviously I'm not in this to try to blow up my blog with 500 million followers or anything, but I would like to spruce it up a bit and make it real niiiiiiice. Ultimately I want to give it my best, no matter what. As my good best friend Ron would say:

I'm ready to Whole-Booty this thang.

Thanks ahead for any and all expert advice/answers/words!

on channeling steve irwin

Freddie's been all about doing outdoorsy things lately. Let's go camping, Emily! No. Let's go camping, Emily! Will I be able to sleep in a bed and not see bugs? No. Let's go camping, Emily! No. And then I realized that in order to have Freddie continue to do all the cooking for the rest of our lives, that I probably needed to find some sort of compromise on the issue of outside things. 

So. Enter hiking. 

We've gone hiking the past two weekends, and I know what you're thinking: hiking in Texas sounds like an oxymoron and/or a lie. Ohhh, you went hiking? Along the flat lands of nothingness? But I promise we've gone hiking walking through some kind of woodland areas. They exist, and it's been fun. For real!

We forget the bug spray and have to find bug spray. We forget the sunscreen and pretend like we are immune to skin cancer. We forget water and stand drinking the water fountain water for 5 minutes each. See? Fun!

Freddie found a state park he wanted to go to this past weekend, Brazos Bend State Park, so off we went. We even remembered bug spray AND sunscreen (but not water...). Now, in all of his Googling I'm sure Freddie found out about the alligator situation at Brazos Bend State Park, and I'm assuming he didn't share the alligator situation with me because...well, then our Saturday hiking fun would have been non-existent. 

I was clueless as to what was in store for my Saturday as we entered the park, as we parked the car, and as we started on the first trail. I saw one sign warning about alligators, but I mean...there were children and dogs walking these trails! So what...they see like...one alligator every five years? Yes?

WRONG. SO WRONG.

The first alligator we saw was far away and we felt super special that we found it. Emily and Freddie for the win! They spotted the only alligator to exist in Brazos Bend! High five!

So we did what any regular, enthusiastic, just-found-the-one-and-only-gator-in-Brazos-Bend-State-Park couple would do.

We merrily kept going along. 

Wait. There was another one. That must means there are two gators in the park! Good to know. 

WAIT. HOLD UP. Then we started to pass a lot of gators, sitting creepily in the water. Four, five, six, seven, and on and on until we got to one that was pretty close to the trail. 

At this point I was starting to question my life/why I was on this trail. As I was pondering such deep, life-changing things I didn't notice Freddie had stopped to take a picture of one of them. That's when IT happened. IT. No, I wasn't bitten. No, I wasn't attacked. Yes, there was one right on the trail in front of me. I froze and considered screaming and/or peeing my pants. I went to grab Freddie aaaaaaand...he wasn't there. I think I said quietly screamed something like FREDDIE WEISS, WHEN YOU LEAVE ME IS WHEN THEY ATTACK ME!!!!!!!!!!!! 

There was a freaking alligator within ten feet of my feet, and there was no way my feet were moving. Freddie got closer. Other people got closer, too. Some people took pictures. Some people silently freaked out. But all these people had something in common: they were dumb moving by it. I stood far behind trying to convince myself why I should walk past that alligator. 

If Steve Irwin could wrestle them, you can walk by one.

WHAT IF IT RUNS.

The signs stay to stay 30 feet away from alligators.

HOW CAN I STAY 30 FEET AWAY WHEN ONE IS 5 FEET AWAY ON THE TRAIL.

Okay, it didn't eat those people so I'm okay.

IT'S WAITING TO MOVE UNTIL I GET THERE. 

^^my brain during this horrific experience. 

After five minutes and ten people walking by, Freddie convinced me to go. 

AND GUESS WHO DECIDED TO FINALLY MOVE A MUSCLE??? Other than me.

Yes, the alligator that was probably going to eat me started moving once we walked by it. What even is the saying that was made up for this moment in my life. What even, alligator?! What even!

Long story short, we finished the 1.5 miles left of the alligator infested trail with lots of squeals, grabbing of Freddie's hand/arm/pant's leg, envisioning an alligator running towards us from the side, and speed walking. And definitely with no looking off the trail on my part. Must. Not. See. Alligators. Trying. To. Eat. Us. 

Then the scenery got beautiful! See?

Beautiful, beautiful, wooded area. With no alligators. But probably with coyotes. But who's looking? Not me. 

Thanks, Brazos Bend, for keeping your state park trails open even though your 400 alligators use them like they own the place. Really. It's a great thing you've got going on there. Real life Jurassic Park. 

Freddie, let's go indoor hiking at the mall next weekend. Deal?

friday favorites - halloween candy in september

Let's jump right into it because...because it's Friday and we gotta get down on Friday.

Favorite Fall Thing I Want 

If you say it is fall, I will agree. But then I go outside in the 90-degree temperatures and stop agreeing. However, in that short time when I am agreeing with you, I'd say that this is my favorite fall thingamabob. 

Halloween candy. <<My personal favorite mix. A to the men. Thank you, God, for Halloween candy fall. Although I am doing a Whole30 right now and cannot eat any of this said H-ween candy for another 7-10 days. Crying myself a river right now.

Favorite Song of the Week
Overnight by Zac Brown Band ft. Trombone Shorty

Freddie plays this song all the time, and then I sing it in my really annoying and/or pretty voice while doing some dance move that kind of looks like the worm, but standing. Anyways, you should do all those things, too.

Disclaimer: I am an adult and know what Zac is talking about in this song. Obviously this song is supposed to be sexy which is why I sing in my non-sexy voice and do my non-sexy dance moves. Obviously. 

Favorite Pilates Move

Blogland, meet the Teaser. Teaser, meet Blogland. After you do the standing worm move from ^^ there, you should get down and do a teaser or ten. Your abs will thank you. 

Favorite Thing I Never Understood But Now Do

The freaking eggplant emoji. All these years I've wondered why in the world the emoji gods thought of ALL the things (cough tacos) that an eggplant was deemed worthy enough for an emoji. Well, Freddie roasted up some eggplant this week and oh. my. gosh. I get it. I get it! It's yummy. It's a vegetable and it's yummy. Success! Success to the vegetable gods and the emoji gods. Now I shall overuse the eggplant emoji.

But let's still have a moment of silence for that yet-to-be-created taco emoji. Somewhere out there taco emoji, you are in our thoughts and prayers. 

Favorite Parks and Rec Quote

Oh boy, this is a hard one. Whoever came up with this prompt is mean. Oh wait, I wrote it. Hmm, okay. This is my current favorite quote from Park and Rec. By current, I mean this minute.

Happy Friday!

Linking up with Karli and Amanda!

things i buy into

I'm gross. 

Let me just start off by admitting that so you all are aware that I am aware of this. 

If I have a big pimple, I will pop it. 

If my sunburn starts to peel, I will peel it. 

Picking, peeling, popping, pulling. All things I do. 

I'm really nice to my skin, obviously. 

Since that last statement is sarcastic, and I am not really nice to my skin, I have been on the hunt to find products that will help me be nice to my skin. That's when I found Cure Natural Aqua Gel.

Normally I skim over facial products when bloggers post about them, but wanna know what caught my eye about this one?

Something gross. 

^^^Beads of dead skin cells. Beads! Dead skin! Are you telling me there is an exfoliator that you can SEE working?! Did we just become best friends?! (me and the face wash, obvi). 

Also apparently it's the No. 1 exfoliator in Japan. How are we so far behind here in 'Murica?! No wonder we all are obese with pizza faces (wait...are we?). We have to get on the same face care level as Japan.

Side note: I'm almost 90% sure that the entire population of Japan is over there right now living life and having no idea that this product exists, much less is supposed to be their No. 1 selling exfoliator... (actually I'm sure the entire population of Japan is sleeping right now, but when they wake up they'll go on with the whole having no idea part). 

The reviews on Amazon make it seem like Jesus himself made this curious exfoliator, and when you use it you will get a glimpse into the billowy, pearly, white gates of Heaven. Maybe even catch a glimpse of Jesus! Sure, there's the rogue review (or two, but literally only two-ish bad reviews) where the person went full on chemist mode and experimented with the product. They said the beads appear EVEN WHEN they had latex gloves on so OBVIOUSLY it's not your dead skin. It's all a hoax! Stop looking at the fake pearly white Heaven gates!

Basically that person is a) maybe right/maybe wrong and b) has way too much time on his or her hands to experiment with Japan's No. 1 selling exfoliator. 

Anyways, blah blah blah, I bought it. And...

// drumroll please //

I love it.  
I don't care if the beads on my face are my dead skin cells or not. This stuff leaves my face feeling smoother AND softer than the smoothest and softest baby's butt. It says only to use it twice a week which makes me want to cry. Why can't my face feel baby booty smooth and soft all day every day?! Whine whine.

So maybe I buy into things way too easily (true), and maybe I should read all reviews on products (instead of reading the upwards of eight...on a good day), but I think Japan knows what is up.

Many thanks to Japan and to Cure for making my face smoothalicious.

Have you heard of this or used it? Or heard of something better that really should be the No. 1 selling exfoliator?? Are you gross, too? Are you tired of questions?

**I was in no way compensated for this post. By Cure or by the country of Japan. I just like feeling my soft face.