when running doesn't suck

Finish this sentence:

Running is _______.

For me, some days running is okay. Running is there. Running is fun(ish). Running is a reason to make a killer running playlist. Running is something I do, due to the fact I wear a leotard 5 days out of the week. 

Running is a lot of things. Like an excuse to take di to the gusting selfies. 

After giving up on my 5K to 10K app (because ew, running is not that fun for me), I decided to just work on my pace. La la la--everybody's working for the...faster paces. That's how that song really goes. 

I was running my weekly 5Ks in about 29.5 minutes. Now...to you speed runners who somehow magically run 3.1 miles in 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, and so on minutes...bless you and your calves and your legs. When you are done with your heel wings, I will take them, please and thank you. I signed up for a race and made it my goal (and destiny) to run this race in 29 minutes. I was going to shave of those pesky 30 seconds and I was going to do it with style and a lot of heaving breathing. 

But...

I put so much pressure on myself to run it in 29 that I turned into a crazy mess with anxiety ridden cramps. I was a ball of fun to be around the night before the race. Just ask Freddie. My thoughts (and words) went a lot like this that night:

I mean, if people can run 5Ks in 16 minutes why can't lil' me run it in a loooong 29 minutes? 

Why does my body hate me? 

Oh my gosh. I'm not even going to do it in under 30 mins.

All of this for nothing.

Why did I start back with running?

I am the slowest.

The clock is going to say 30 minutes.

It's the chocolate. I should stop eating that every night. 

That's it. After today I'm going to change what I eat.

Blah. Blah. Freaking blah. You've all said it before and you've certainly all heard it before. Moving on.

Ricky laughed at me and tsk-tsk'ed at me and patted my head and told me to just have fun. Not to turn on my running app, but just to blast my music and have fun. 

Have Fun. Have Fun. 

Mother Nature also decided that she would have fun by making the weather drop to a breezy 37 degrees the morning of the race. 

Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Freeze Warning. 

I listened to the man who feeds me every day (I mean, he's pretty smart and I like to be fed), and when the gun blared for us to begin, I just pressed play on my music, ignored my MapMyRun app, and was off. 

That's me saying pooh-pooh to the weather and MapMyRun app, too. 

I don't really remember what went through my brain during the race. Mostly because I'm halfway certain my brain was frozen along with my fingers and toes. You know when you get so cold that you can't feel your nose and you know snot is running down your face, but you can't really feel it? Yeah. Me. That morning.  There I was, frozen and with no idea what my time was, when I came up to the finish line and saw that the clock said 28 minutes.

And I nearly pooped my pants. In the excited way, obviously. 

BECAUSE REMEMBER??? I WASN'T EVEN GOING TO BE ABLE TO RUN IT IN UNDER 30! MY BODY HATED ME!

I ran my first 5K, 3 years ago, in 34 minutes. Goodbye, 6 minutes. You are not missed! Don't come back! Here's your hat, what's your hurry! And all that. 

I spent the rest of the day eating bagels and pizza because I mean, I basically ran a marathon, right?...

You know the movie 28 Days Later? This is a still from my upcoming movie 28 Minutes Later. Wink.

Running is something that sometimes sucks and sometimes makes you want to stop and cry while finding the nearest hot tub, but running is also something that makes you feel invincible and like your body really can do amazing things.

Because your body can do amazing things.

Thanks, Running.